Finding Friendships

A recent column in Time called You Gotta Have Friends reported on a recent study that said our society is becoming increasingly lonely. In the last 20 years Americans report a one-third drop in the number of friendships with whom they can share 'important matters.' Brad and Wayne talk about the unique challenges and opportunities of cultivating close friendships when you no longer a part of a local congregation—or even if you are!


  1. The following from

    “FJORD: The term fjord, although commonly used in Norwegian and Danish, is not universally used for naming fjords in other countries. Many fjords are called “canals”, “inlets” and “sounds”, e.g. Hood Canal and Burrard Inlet in the Pacific Northwest.”

    There ya go.

    “CHURCH: A church building (or simply church) is a building used in Christian worship. See also altar, altar rails, apse, confessional, chapel, dome, lych gate, nave, narthex, pew, pulpit, sanctuary.”

    Sigh… there ya go.

  2. Well, of course “church” means a building 🙂 — it is a form of the word kirke (spelling?) which actually means “Lord’s building” as opposed to ekklesia, which means called out ones. The KJV people knew exactly what they were doing when they mistranslated it that way — so why do we insist on “reclaiming” a word to mean a people that actually does mean a building??? So why don’t we reclaim ekklesia instead? To me, the church is the building because that is what the word actually means….

    Now, if we were to take back the word gay, which originally meant “happy” now that would be a different matter entirely…..

  3. Hi Tyler,

    You’re right, it is the word that’s wrongly used to begin with in the NT. I just found this info of interest:

    “The English dictionary reveals that the English word “church” which is used in our English Bible is taken from the late Greek word “kyridakon” not “ekklesia.” The Greek word “kyridakon” is not found in the New Testament and only came into being in the 16th Century long after New Testament times. Thus the English word “church” cannot be translated back into Greek because there is no word in the New Testament Greek that is the equivalent of the understanding of the English word.” (from:

    I bet if we reclaimed the work ekklesia we’d still have the same problem…

    “So, where do you ekklesia? Where do you assemble?” The focus remains on the place of gathering rather than on the “called out ones” that gather together.

    This is really all not a problem for me but is interesting in understand it better.



  4. Once again I am so challenged. I am blown away that in 28 years of being a charismatic I have never heard such thinking. I realize that most of my encounters with people have had an agenda-they gotta get saved and I’ll be damned(excuse me) if I don’t tell them. Wow. The thought of just loving people is wonderful And it isn’t that I haven’t heard we need to love people. I have been surrounded by Christians my whole christian walk-my kids went to a christian school and were homeschooled for a few years, I worked at the christian school when there were there; I worked at a christian mothers morning out for awhile; I am always with like minded people and to be honest it’s gotten quite boring. I thank you once again for making me think out of the box. You may get sick of me commenting on everything I hear but I feel like I am drinking fresh water and can’t get enough.
    On being lonely, I have been at this church for 23 years and I don’t feel close to anyone there. My husband is a deacon and so we are considered part of leadership, but I can’t remember the last time we were invited to someone’s home(not home groups, but just lets get together). I was gone for three weeks helping my daughter take care of her 2 kids while she had a new born, and no one said anything about glad you’re back until about 5 minutes before we left because we wer hanging around to take the guest speaker to lunch and we were like last ones there. It hurt.
    Anyway I think God is answering my prayers to know him deeper and to show me what real christianity looks like because I am beginning to see it .

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