The Fruit of Self-Control (#772)

A funny thing happened to Kyle and Wayne on their way to talk about the new Netflix Documentary, The Social Dilemma; they got distracted by a conversation about self-control as a fruit of the Spirit and not a personal discipline. After sharing about his recent trip to Denver, Wayne takes Kyle through some recent emails and blog posts that were particularly poignant. That's where the found a question about self-control and whether or not God can help us out of some of our own bad choices. That led to a discussion about career choices when the quality of life is greatly diminished by the demands of an employer, of how "doing the right thing" is hardly a consideration any more in our culture, and how we find freedom from the selfishness of this age inside the love of God. We'll get to The Social Dilemma next week.

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  1. I hope you’re the only one who knows Christians who prefer Trump because they have no self control either. The ones I know don’t approve of his “self-centeredness” but are horrified about the possibility of the other option’s preference for sacrificing the innocents to the goddess of “choice”.

    Another less serious comment: it was amusing to hear you talking about doing what’s ‘right’ / not focusing on what Wayne wants while not giving Kyle an opening til the end. ?

  2. We are made in a image that gives everyone the keys to the kingdom. The Brain and Heart should line up together with the spirit to live in the kingdom.
    Oh how Jesus died for all sins.
    Oh plant the seeds that will grow in your life play in the soil that will take that seed and multiple it many folds.
    Stay away from the ground of rocks and little top soil where you will not enjoy the fruits and provision that he has already for you and given to
    you before you even ask.
    Should we really get involved in politics at any time is a good question to ponder on but I know of a man who never bothered to do so.
    Are we to play in a world of who decides what is good for us which side are we to choose from what side of the Sword are we to play in just wondering.
    The world is pulling at our hearts and minds to give us fear in which case seems to be working at a rate we don’t know what to do or are really afraid to know possibly.

    Oh how the scales come back to cover our eyes. The world trying to pull us into darkness.

    To pray for something is like praying for rain while maybe we should be praying rain in our closet that he has already given us to over come with such ease.
    Sometimes maybe maybe we forget about how to pray.
    Jesus said it is done it’s possible that we should dig a little more into the meaning and understanding of what is done.

    I ponder myself at times and forget that he is in me Everytime I breathe he is right there as I inhale and exhale.

    To close my eyes and mediate just a little so I can hear his voice and also he can hear mine.

    Knowledge at times hinders and binds a person’s growth because he is always searching with his mind only and his heart has no place to rest.

    We are spirit in a body of flesh and most people don’t realize it and possibly never told also.

    I had always wondered when Jesus said I go to make a place for you I had always thought that it was when I died but in reality it was hear on earth it’s for today many Manson’s.

    How one can tap into the kingdom that is already in us alive and well.

  3. Thanks for discussion on self control. I’ve been pondering it over past fortnight.

    As you guys were talking I felt my heart conclude that Godly self control only occurs in the context of all the other fruits of the spirit. When I am being loving, kind, patient and gentle it produces joy, peace, goodness and faithfulness. It’s a whole package in self control that produces life; an expression of God’s love.

    First time I thought about self control as a fruit was reading Danny Silk’s book “Loving our Kids on Purpose”. I learnt that maintaining my own self control while parenting the children rather than becoming angry, produced a much more peaceful home. If my relationship with the children was the most important thing as a parent, I needed to exercise self control to honour it. Wish I’d discovered the book before the older two had left home! Always prayed as they were growing up that God’s grace would meet them where I failed, and know God is still healing my internal regrets.

    I like the idea of self control as a discipline when practising it as a fruit of the spirit. In the context of raising children it’s necessary. When I wanted them to do something that would help our household, I needed to practice self control in the way I communicated especially when they weren’t listening or doing what I’d asked. The fruit resulting in a good relationship and the children being functional members of society.

    My thoughts are rambling with self control as a discipline. If it’s about mastering it so I can say “I’m very self controlled” then it’s the work I’ve done. The funny thing is that when I slip up and loose control the reality is that I never truely mastered it.

    Self control that is self focus isn’t bad though, especially when it’s about caring for yourself. To say “no” to the second helping of cheesecake, or manager that keeps loading on the work without support or resource, or conversation that is becoming gossipy.

    If I become self righteous in my ability to be self controlled it’s not a pretty picture. Thinking about times I’ve felt frustrated or angry that someone isn’t doing what I think they should do, it’s really about me wanting to control them so I feel better. It’s easy to look down on and judge that person, to disregard them. Yuck!!! My self righteousness obscures the door to relationship. However in times when anger or frustration rise and I practice Godly self-control I implicitly say “you are free to choose your actions and control yourself“ (and live with the consequences). I might not like it but I choose to love and respect you, and let you be free to control yourself.

    Self control as a fruit of the spirit – definitely not a burden to carry.

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