Communicating Through Trauma (#868)
Chances are you know someone who has been traumatized, and trying to communicate past their trauma can be difficult and frustrating. While you think you're helping them you unintentionally make them feel more threatened. What do you do when a spouse or good friend can't see or isn't ready to address their trauma? Kyle and Wayne focus on how to communicate through trauma, talking about when to risk vulnerability, what to do when someone regrets telling you something intimate, and how to ensure that telling someone what's true does not exceed their security in your affection for them.
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About people often not showing the feedback on receiving truth and being hurt later….I often seem to dissociate at the moment of pain. I may wake up 3 days later and think, wow…that hurt. Or now I feel embarrassed because after the painful truth is revealed, I don’t know how to love myself in that space.
These have been alternatively true in my life, at different times with sometimes no awareness. Now my awareness is high…it doesn’t stop it altogether….wish it would….but I can come back to the front of my brain and work through it once the threat response has passed. I often get depressed that this is my life…but it is what it is. Hopefully, those who you have offered that loving piece of truth to, will down the road see it’s intent and value. This is just all so hard.
I was in a situation many years ago where I realized I had to love someone enough to let them hate me for a bit. I hoped they would understand my intent and heart, and thank God they did. It turned out well. Sometimes it doesn’t seem to at all…but who’s to say you may have just been the seed sower…someone else will harvest. That’s good too.
Lisa, thank you for being so vulnerable with your story and adding a significant reflection to this podcast. It is not always easy to recognize what the other person in a conversation is going through and allow them the space to process incoming light with Jesus, realizing that can take a while.