Redeeming Love: Unforeseen Circumstances (#854)

On April 11, Wayne returned from an 11-day trip to the east coast to some "unforeseen circumstances" that he said would change the trajectory of his life. They have, and that story can now be told. Over the next few weeks, Wayne and Kyle, and eventually Sara will share a story that is intensely personal and perhaps not for everyone, but at the same time, it illustrates how God helps us navigate perilous waters, even if when we struggle to believe what he is revealing to us.

Podcast Notes:
Previous podcasts with Sara: Learning Love More Deeply (2012)  •  Finding Our Way to Us (2020)  •  Finding Our Way to Us Part 2 (2020)
The Body Keeps the Score by Bessel van der Kolk, M.D.
Try Softer by Aundi Kolber
Being Known Podcast with Curt Thompson, MD - Season 4 is about unpacking trauma

18 Comments

  1. Hi Wayne,

    It seems like this is about the hundredth time I have tried to write some kind of words of encouragement. So all I will say right now is you and Sara (and anyone attached to these goings on) are in my dedicated prayers… FOR REAL.

    Sincere Love to you both.

    Marcia

  2. Thank you Wayne and Sara for your courageous transparency. You’re right that it helps more people than you know…may God richly bless you both. (Ever considered doing a “Marshill” 2 hour podcast deal…hard to wait for the next installment….wink…only kidding) Know that the impact of how you live is powerful as Jesus grace spills out. Marcia, appreciated some of your earlier comments on the blog and nice to see you post again. Sue

  3. I think two hours of this would be a tough listen, just like it was with Mars Hill. I like savoring a story more than that. We’ll see. Maybe we will post an extra one some week, just so it won’t take so long.

  4. I couldn’t stop crying while listening to this story. I have a trauma brain myself (which I’ve been to counselling for and THOUGHT it was “cured” but there seems to be many layers to undo!) and fawning is what I tend to do to try to appease people to make myself feel ‘safe’ whenever I feel anxious and then I end up getting resentful inside if it’s not appreciated. Which is kinda stupid when I think about it but in the moment, my brain doesn’t think of that. “Running” has been tempting, if it weren’t for lack of finances to do it, I’d have run away from all that’s causing me anxiety right now. Run to where, I have no idea, so the sane part of my brain keeps me in check as it knows running doesn’t make anything better. Oh what a mess my brain is! I look forward to hearing Sarah’s end of things as I feel like it will be helpful to my own soul right now.

  5. (From Wayne:) Sheri, my heart broke reading this. Your response is not “stupid” at all. God made your brain to work in certain ways to protect us and while those responses aren’t always rational coming from the amygdala, they are designed to keep you safe. This is why Sara wanted to tell her story, to help people like her when she didn’t have the resources to deal with thoughts in her head she could not control. Your brain may be a bit of a mess, but it is a beautiful mess and Father wants to be at work in it to help you sort things out and discover how you can live more wholeheartedly in his goodness. I can’t wait until you hear from Sara either, but in the meantime, please read TRY SOFTLY. Take slow and listen to what the author is saying. It will really help you. It has really helped us.

  6. Sorry to hear what you’ve gone through, but hoping for the best for you and Sara, whatever that looks like.

  7. I don’t really listen to The God Journey anymore, but get your emails and kind of vaguely stay abreast of what you’re up to. I missed the “hiatus” part and had no idea anything like this was going on. But the title of “The Unforeseen Circumstances” came across my screen and caught my eye and I took a listen. Wow. So many thoughts, so many emotions, so many questions. But for now, I just want to thank you for your courage and vulnerability in sharing this with the community who loves you both. It’s simply living up to the name of the podcast. Having spent a little time with both you and Sarah, it really hits deeply to feel a bit of the reality of the experience you’re going through. Peace, grace, strength, wisdom, and love to you both today, tomorrow, and each day as this journey unfolds.

  8. Hi – words fail me!
    How many folk listened without tears?
    The first line is a lie because I proceeded to write a sentence.
    Blessings in Jesus’ name.

  9. Thank you! You model vulnerability masterfully. Continued prayers for you, Sara, and your kids.

  10. Wayne and Sara, really feel for both of you. We are sure that we will hear a mighty work of our loving Father in the near future . Thank you for your honesty and openness and many people will find comfort in this experience. Loved the God Journey and Lifestream since the early 2010/11
    Living Father continue your amazing work in Wayne and Sara’s lives.

  11. First off, I want to thank you Wayne from the bottom of my heart for sharing this very personal story. I want to thank Sara in advance, also, as you stated she will be sharing, too. And Kyle, once again thank you for sharing your journey and experiences with your own trauma. I have so much I want to express in all the ways The God Journey has helped me and now through this story. But for time’s sake, my prayer is please, just know the gratitude…

    Wayne, I would like to say if my ex-husband had responded in all the ways you did for Sara, that you shared in this podcast, we might not have divorced. “Tending her garden” is the true heart of our Father.

  12. Thank u for including your listeners inside of something so deeply personal and still unfolding. I feel honored to have heard your story and will be praying for the beauty God is and will bring out of this for you both.

  13. Wayne, when you shared what you experienced coming home, it wad like a punch to the gut. I felt the anxiety bubbling up in my throat because I have experienced abandonment like that before (not in a marriage) and fear it happening in my marriage. But I also completely understand Sara’s perspective and cannot wait to hear her share. I have spent a lifetime struggling with feeling like “not enough” and having to be the perfect (fill in the blank) so that I don’t annoy the other person. I see this now effecting my marriage, so my heart both broke for you two, but also was encouraged that you both were willing to share something so vulnerable. May you both be blessed in this process, but also protected from the unkindness others might express (a concern I immediately felt for you both).

    • Thanks for your comment, Danielle. As horrible as those events were after I returned home, they don’t compare to what my wife endured between 4 and 7, nor what this trauma, as it surfaced, was doing to her over the previous 9 months. I’ll be glad when that story is told, too. She is a woman of amazing courage and grace, and truly what she did to me was the only thing she knew to survive. You’ll hear from her this week.

      And, yes, we have met some unkindness in dealing with Sara’s story, but the vast majority of people have been overwhelmingly grateful and supportive, and the joy that we get to celebrate now is worth every bit of pain we’ve been through. We don’t need to share this story for us; we are already living the fruit of it. But Sara wanted to tell it for those who are suffering from traumatic brain reactions and just like her may not even know it yet. That revelation for Sara has changed the arc of her life and has rewritten her entire story with such grace and beauty.

  14. The most helpful podcast. I cried all the way through it.
    I’m not sure what the Lord is dealing with in me. But it’s good. However painful the process might be.

  15. Wayne,
    Your story unfolding brought back memories of a separation for 4 years 1988-1992 and how God spoke, comforted and encouraged me those years of brokenness… We are together married now 46 yrs. I am 70 and God is still at work completing His Purpose in us … the Lord did many miraculous moves in those 4 years but is still working to remove walls of separation… long story but Religion and tradition were the weapons of separation the Lord has been and is redeeming the Outcome.
    Blessings, I have enjoyed your books and podcasts… Frank

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